Pondering Jokes

3,041 views

One Woman’s Random Thoughts

Skinny people irritate me! Especially when they say things like, “You know sometimes I just forget to eat.” Now I’ve forgotten my address, my mother’s maiden name, and my keys. But I’ve never forgotten to eat. You have to be a special kind of idiot to forget to eat!

3,007 views

Police Department Answering Machine

Hello, you have reached the Police Department’s Voice Mail. Pay close attention as we have to update the choices often as new and usual circumstances arrive. Please select one of the following options:

2,543 views

Everything I Know I Learned From My Mother

My mother taught me CONSIDERATION FOR OTHERS…. “I just scrubbed that floor. Go outside and bleed in the entry.”

2,206 views

Alternate Medical Terms

Benign: What you be after you be eight.

2,332 views

You’re Lost Between Baby Boomer and Generation X if…

You remember when Jordache jeans with a flat-handle comb in the back pocket was cool.

2,890 views

Odds & Ends

Never raise your hands to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.

2,204 views

They Said It

Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a man’s genitals through his wallet.

2,664 views

A Lifetime of Learning

I’ve learned that I like my teacher because she cries when we sing “Silent Night”……. –Age 6

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