Joke of the Day

Noah Today

The Lord spoke to Noah and said, “Noah, in six months I am going to make it rain until the whole world is covered with water and all the evil things are destroyed. But, I want to save a few good people and two of every living thing on the planet.

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Archive for Older Jokes

28,866 views

Why Dogs Can’t Use Computers

He’s distracted by cats chasing his mouse.

9,742 views

Apply for a Job with the Railroad

Fred was applying for a job as a flagman/switch operator on the railroad. The chief engineer was conducting the interview.

14,549 views

Useful Phrases for High Stress Days

Do I really look like a people person?

12,712 views

Gender Roles

Barbara Walters had done a story on gender roles in Kuwait several years before the Gulf War, and she noted then that women customarily walked about 10 feet behind their husbands.

29,589 views

Wanted

A group of elementary school students were on a field trip to the local police station. Several of the children were fascinated by the wanted posters on the wall.

17,199 views

Something from the Bar?

A man is sitting in the coach section of a flight from New York to Chicago, biting his fingernails and sweating profusely. Noticing his disturbed expression, a flight attendant walks over and says, “Sir, can I get you something from the bar to calm you down?”

20,366 views

The Watermelon Patch

There was a farmer who raised watermelons. He was doing pretty well, but he was plagued by local kids who would sneak into his patch at night and steal watermelons.

18,458 views

Measuring

A city slicker came upon two country folk balancing a long piece of lumber vertically on the ground, while a third fellow with a measuring tape climbed up on the lumber.

17,771 views

Just Plane Dumb

The military commander had grown increasingly anxious over rumors of an impending air strike from the enemy. So, he summoned a corporal. “I want you to climb that mountain and report any signs of a military activity.”

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